The Climate Death Cult’s Mask Is Slipping

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by Matt Agorist, The Free Thought Project:

(Corbett Report) Have you heard the latest nonsense from the climate cultists?

No, I’m not talking about recycling human hair to change the weather.

And I’m not talking about the hot new fad of defacing works of art (and the US constitution) to end climate change.

No, I’m talking about the incredible, newly discovered (and peer-reviewed!) scientific fact that the act of breathing in and out is itself an offense against the weather gods. Or, in the slightly higher-falutin’ language of the clickbait headline writers:

TRUTH LIVES on at https://sgtreport.tv/

Humans Are Fueling Global Warming By Just Breathing, Study Claims

Indeed.

But have you actually read the study that generated these headlines? And, more to the point, did you sift through that pseudoscientific propaganda to get to the bloodcurdling reality that lies beneath the headlines? When you do drill down, you’ll discover that the real utility of a “scientific” study like this one stems not from any perceived scientific merit, but from the role it plays in furthering a very dark agenda. And, armed with that knowledge, you’ll be better equipped to confront the cultists’ agenda.

Intrigued? Here, let me explain . . .

THE STUDY

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Or, in plain English: human breathing contributes to “climate change.”

If you follow the link to the paper itself, you’ll discover that its authors collected 328 “breath samples” from 104 British volunteers to determine whether or not human beings are guilty of exhaling greenhouse gases—in this case, methane (CH4) and nitrous oxide (N2O).

The results? It turns out that, yes, 31% of those sampled were found to be “methane producers” (handily abbreviated “MPs” in the paper) and “[a]ll participants were found to emit N2O in breath.”

Zounds! Do you know what this means?!!

Yeah, neither do the researchers. Specifically, they were not able to account for variations in emissions from any of the volunteers based on any of the variables (age, sex, dietary habits, smoking habits) examined.

But there is one thing this crack team of scientists are sure of: these startling results have revealed human breath to be a significant and hitherto neglected source of climate change.

But wait! That’s not all.

We report only emissions in breath in this study, and flatus emissions are likely to increase these values significantly, though no literature characterises these emissions for people in the UK.

That’s right, “flatus”! Your farts are really making the weather gods angry, folks! And don’t even get me started on cow burps!

Luckily, the King of England has spent years developing state-of-the-art, cutting-edge technology to take on the cow burp threat.

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