Another DIE Success Story!


by Julius Burke, American Thinker:

Rich people love to outsource, and for a while, nobody in the world was richer than Americans.  That’s why, after we ran out of industries to outsource, we began to outsource our families.  Kids are too childish and messy, so we send them to daycares.  Old people are, too, so we outsourced them to the nursing homes.  We don’t even have the decency to in-house our nursing homes, so we outsourced those to the Mexicans and Filipinos.


Three hundred years ago, we also did our outsourcing in-house.  Instead of having the Mexicans do our farming, we imported some black people and forced them to do it for free.  Undoing this has been the whole trajectory of the past 100 years, with mixed results.  We no longer export labor to other races for free.  Now you have to pay the people who do all your work for you, and somehow you try to get richer doing it.  This is called capitalism, and the trick is to pay as little as possible.

That’s why you still export.  Doing things in-house in a constitutional republic means the neighbors get upset about their rights, but if they’re unemployed, you can just blame the Mexicans you imported or the Chinese you exported labor to.  It’s a simple sleight-of-hand that works when you call it free trade (for the Republicans) or anti-racism (for the Democrats).

The goal of exporting everything for cheap was to lie around planning what to do with your money while other people have to wipe you and your whole family for pennies.  This is the definition of success.  But eventually the people you exported labor to catch on and want to export all the work for themselves.  Ursula Burns, a black woman named after the sea witch in The Little Mermaid, was one such person.  Her story of exporting her family was described by CNBC, in an article they tastefully titled “The first Black woman CEO in the Fortune 500 on work-life balance: ‘You don’t have ‘to go to all your kids’ games.’”

Long story short, she didn’t go to all her kids’ games.  CNBC says she didn’t even pay attention while she was there.  She says the “work-life balance” argument is silly, and if you go all work, you can have somebody else do the life for you.  So (I kid you not) she did crossword puzzles at her kids’ games and made her family members watch the kids — a genius trick that tied up the oldest people with the youngest.  She says she raised (wink wink!) two “unbelievably good kids.”  Nowhere mentioned in the article is how the kids feel about her.

This last part is important, because there are only two groups who can judge how you raise your kids: your kids and the people they deal with.  And there are only two groups of people who can judge how you run a business: the customers and the people in the business.  We don’t have a record of what the kids say because CNBC doesn’t care, but unfortunately for Ursula the Sea Witch Burns, we have a record of what the hires say.  And she had one of the most hated records in the history of Xerox.

Time Magazine, in fact, lists her as one of the (quote) “9 CEOs with the absolute worst reputations” and says that while she raked in millions of dollars yearly and oversaw big raises for upper management, she didn’t give any raises to rank-and-file employees, and she laid off so many that she had to call the police to the layoffs.  During her reign, over two thirds of the employees had a negative opinion of her.

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