from The Babylon Bee:

LAKE JACKSON, TX — Former Congressman Ron Paul was spotted muttering nervously to himself today while standing in line to see Santa Claus at a nearby shopping mall, as he hoped this would finally be the year he would get what he wanted by asking for the 47th consecutive year for Santa to end the Fed.

“This is the year, I just know it,” Dr. Paul was overheard whispering as he inched closer to the front of the line. “I’ve been asking for the same thing every Christmas for almost half a century now. Surely this year will be the year I finally get it. I’ve been so good all year long!”