from The Babylon Bee:
DALLAS, TX—Clad in fedoras, smoking cigars, and wielding Tommy guns, prohibition enforcement agents raided a speakeasy salon today, busting a dangerous gang of haircutting criminals.
The community thanked the brave agents for keeping them safe from the underground haircutting crime ring. The business has been operating in secret, with hair stylists opening a little eye slot and asking for the password before letting ladies in to get their hair cut. Authorities believe they have smuggled hundreds of desperate women in for cuts, colors, and even deadly shampoos.