Plain burger: hold the virus pickles, they don’t exist


by Jon Rappoport, No More Fake News:

Shh. Shh. Stop saying the virus doesn’t exist.



ONE: Let’s not get distracted by the virus question. We have to focus on knocking down the vaccine mandate.

My Reply: Can you walk down the street, carry a bag of potatoes, and look at messages on your cell phone? Newsflash: people have been known to do several things at the same time.


TWO: If we bring up the virus question, people will call us crazy and have a reason to ignore our criticism of the vaccine.

My Reply: “People” already say we’re crazy. They have 345 “reasons” on file.

THREE: If we say the virus doesn’t exist, “our base” will desert us.

My Reply: “Our base” is so outraged about the ineffective and hugely destructive vaccine, and about the mandates, NOTHING will deter them from attacking the vaccine.

FOUR: It’s well established that the virus exists.

My Reply: Yes, established by the same scientists who say the vaccine is remarkably safe and effective.

FIVE: Doctor A says the virus exists. As evidence, he cites Doctor B’s statements. Doctor B says the virus exists. He cites Doctor C’s statements. Doctor C says the virus exists. He cites Doctor A.

My Reply: Go back to school. I suggest starting at the 4th grade.

SIX: It doesn’t really matter whether the virus exists.

My Reply: If the virus doesn’t exist, the pandemic is a hoax. If the pandemic is a hoax…trace all the implications. If you can’t, go back to school. I suggest starting at the second grade. If the school won’t let you in, tell them you identify as a six-year old.

SEVEN: If I say the virus doesn’t exist, my family will disown me.

My Reply: I see. Other than the virus question—you’re on very good terms with your family, right? Who are you trying to kid?

Speaking of kid, here’s another dialogue for your edification—

ME: Hey kid, aren’t you fed up with all this COVID crap?

KID: Listen, Grandpa, I’m been fed up with crap since I was born.

ME: Including Biden now?

KID: The brain-damaged guy in the White House?

ME: What about Trump?

KID: The guy who keeps pushing the killshot? Pfizer paid him a million bucks to stage his inauguration.

ME: Do you wear a mask?

KID: I wore one once, at the DMV, when I applied for my driver’s license. The witch behind the counter told me I had to put that germicide goo on my hands. So I did. I wiped my hands on the counter. She called security. I don’t drive. I take the bus.

ME: What about the vaccine?

KID: Let me put it this way. My cell phone says I took the shot.

ME: Did you get depressed during the lockdowns?

KID: No. I made money fixing old people’s computers. When I went to their houses, I wore a military uniform. Nobody bothered me.

ME: Are you woke?

KID: You mean do I think everything move I make is motivated by systemic racism? That crap is for my friends whose parents give them money. They all moved away. Their parents took them to Florida.

ME: What about the virus?

KID: What about it?

ME: Do you think it exists?

KID: The people who say it does—I don’t listen to anything they say.

ME: Why not?

KID: If you can’t figure that out, Grandpa, you’re older than you look.

ME: Are there a lot of kids like you?

KID: Millions.

ME: Do they listen to the government?

KID: You mean the mafia. We don’t pay protection money to anybody.

ME: Do these millions of kids take the vaccine?

KID: It’s always a tip-off when somebody says, “Hey, it’s free.” We’re not that stupid.

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